The Cosby Sweater

I was wearing one. At one point, I felt it best represented me in my dream world, but soon I found myself in department stores, envying dresses and their equally enviable price tags.

This is my soul, I thought. I should be happy with it. It is knitted from all sorts of colors. It is snug in the wrists and loose everywhere else.

I was entered in a modeling contest. An estranged coworker had now become Tyra Banks. 

"But I don't want to model," I pleaded. Be fierce, she said. 

So I strutted down the runway in my torn jeans and in my soul sweater. All the other models were taller and thinner, but there wasn't enough room in this dream to be insecure about more than one thing.

I didn't win.

I considered pulling a thread of the sweater, but a girl sitting on a bench stopped me. She grabbed my wrist, making it more snug. She said, "Maybe you should find a boy in a Cosby sweater. He will be your sweater mate." 

Sometimes the moment you gain some coherency in your dreams you wake up. No joke: I knew what she meant and I woke myself up.

I don't want to fucking date a hipster. 

Note: In the dream before this one, there were locusts in my water. I was spitting out segments of wings and swallowing the rest. To dream of locusts means stains on the soul or the destroying of creativity, which is probably why my insecure dream-self would overcompensate by dressing in a brightly-colored sweater to symbolize the soul. Locusts also represent facts that can affect the development of your soul. So spitting out bits of locusts probably means that I'm not ready to accept the truth about something. And then to top it off, the threat of being compatible with a hipster in my dream is my hidden fear of losing my identity. 

If the state of my soul is at risk I think a cleansing might be in order.